ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
im about as happy as oj after his trial
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
If she gets mad at me, that only means more free time for me. I like to put myself I win win situations. Despite being in a relationship, I still find ways to accomplish my goals.
I'd give anything to be driving a pirate ship wearing nothing but a coconut bra and a grass skirt eating a pizza and watching dolphins jump in the waves. Dreams ya gotta have dreams
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
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