Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
So he texted me two hours ago to tell me he just took two hits of acid. Now he's asking me if it's possible for a house to breathe.
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
I always "accidentally" drop a condom and make sure she sees it's a magnum. By the time I'm inside her and she realizes how small I am, it's all over in a flash and I'm done. Plus, they never call back so I never have to see the girl ever again. #gratefulforprematuretinypenis
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
All I want is dick and wine.
I had a dream involving the worlds smallest pony, an asphalt volcano, and jimi hendrix. Never smoking 3 bowls before bed again
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
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