Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
A woman in the waiting room at the STD clinic told me that she is going to pray to jesus for my penis.
and people in Baltimore still get a bad wrap.
We were sexting and then the radio announced robert pattinson would be playing kurt cobain in a movie and it totally killed the mood
i wrote down the address for planned parenthood on the back of the receipt for the condom that broke
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
I woke up with a dick pic from the ex-Mormon via email. Not really what I wanted to see before my first cup of coffee this morning, but I gotta say, I'm impressed.
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
Randomize
