i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
Yeah bro I don't know how she's gonna explain the black eye, how else do you tell your boss "my knee hit me in the face during sex last night"
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
in other news i'm homewrecking via instagram
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
I just remembered that the guy I slept with last night has "USDA PRIME" tattooed on his ass
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
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