at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
I just remembered yelling "they're gonna let me be a lawyer! Me! Why would they do that?"
Just realized my talking to the tv hockey voice is same as my sex voice. Life just got a whole lot weirder.
it was like having sex with a tree stump
Best thing law school has taught me: how to use logic to turn a girls "no I will not have sex with you" into "well I might as well get laid"
THEY'RE. IN. YOUR. BED. THEY RANDOMLY SHOW UP. AND GET IN YOUR BED.
I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week
I wish I could rewind to my 8th birthday instead. I wanna wake up, eat as much cake as I want, and have a Transformers birthday party without someone judging me.
I don't think it's considwred fine dining when you're passing out at golden palace in chinatown at 4 am with you boss who happens to be wearing a dress.
official rule: if your drunk, it doesn't count
then nothing in my life counts
So I found where you barfed in my house. Just wanted to let you know that my cat barfed on the kitchen floor in a show of solidarity
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
i believe in u and ur pee
Randomize
