I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
i found a beer bottle on top of the urinal, peed in it and put it back... if anyone gets drunk enough to fall for it they deserve it
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
We figured you were on something when you said that your nipples couldn't hear the music.
i wish i could say that was the first 40 year old woman from the circus I nailed
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
fyi: first time in five days i havent washed my birth control down with liquor. when are we going out tonight?
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
Randomize
