where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
Every time I get scared about the fact that I'm falling for him I remember that he juggles and is hung like a mastadon and everything is a-ok.
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
I kept petting the scarves and telling customers to "feel that shit"
Stop drinking at work.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
Oh I will totally be your beard, but on one condition I get to watch you and your boy friend have sex.
You know you're doing well in life when weed is considered to improve your job performance
The best part about theater chicks is nothing is too cliche or out of line. I just fucked her Braveheart style in my entry way while saying goodbye.
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
Randomize