I just had unprotected sex with a stranger. but i did him wearing nothing but my pearls. so its classy.
your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
Just checked my bank account while shitting blood. Neither action felt good when I was done.
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
I don't know what to tell you, usually I would just ask if they'd like to meet the captain. If you can't get laid it's your problem.
You made me pull over because you thought a leaf was a twenty rolling across the road.
Some older looking guy gave me his card as he exited the train. Hes a pharmaceutical rep. I'm debating asking him for a job. Obv he wants sex but if I can get a job out of this maybe I can offer him more than a cheap dry handjob bc that's all I'm really up for these days
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
I'm eating lunchables with a glass of wine while I FaceTime the guy I lost my virginity to.
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
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