Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
I forgot i ate a salad for dinner, so while i was barfing in his toilet, i kept screaming "i ate leaves?? i cant believe you let me eat leaves!"
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
I need you to send me a picture of your dick. I want to forward it to that girl and you and i both know you're more impressively sized
he called me from germany to tell me about all the gummy bears he bought...i'm doubting his sobriety
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
we broke up because he couldn't handle the fact that i've slept with more girls than he has. also, i've slept with the girl he's seeing now.
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
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