i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
Do you think when graham bell invented the phone he ever thought that people would be using them to facebook on the shitter?
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
i got us a cheese tray and a bottle of whiskey
ugh yes i love our date nights
Where are you and why am I suddenly responsible for your taquitos?
I can't wait for the 4th. I'll probably get drunk and end up puking all over whichever 18 year old I end up making out with.
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
Just saw a guy I fucked in a clown suit in the bar. It's not Halloween. I have got to start making better life decisions.
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
Randomize