My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
i asked a few people if they wanted to make pancakes with me but no one would. thats why i'm drunk by myself right now
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
It feels like a bunch of leprechauns are using my brain as a soccer ball
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
Now when you said you'd never sleep with me, did you really mean never on a Monday or never without handcuffs or a blindfold or never on a airplane or never without lots of booze? Cus never is a pretty strong word.
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
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