i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
it was like eating out sand paper
U of I kids don't fist pump to Sweet Caroline. Get me the fuck out of here.
You should have seen her outfit yesterday. It was like pretty woman before Richard Gere gave her money to buy a new outfit.
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
His arresting officer when they were busting up the squat party recognized him from the anti-drone protest. He was like Jesus kid, you were sober last time.
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
man my uterus needs to drop the egg or GTFO, BUUUSHIT
99% of the contents of my handbag are ketchup packets and condoms. I feel that says a lot about me as a person.
Randomize
