i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
only you would end up drunk at a subway with a one-eyed homeless man
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
The worst part was when I went to go spit it out and rinse my mouth, his grandpa was in the bathroom, so I had to fucking wait. It was awful. I finally ran to the kitchen and prayed his parents didn't come out of their room.
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
I just swallowed confetti and motor-boated some guys beard...#happy2015
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
Randomize
