What are you doing?
High. Watching Billy Mays infomercials...
That guy could sell me cancer.
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
She came to the party dressed as slutty elmo and then called me oscar the grouch for not wanting to bang her in the dumpster outside.
she is way to in-touch with her childhood
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
You know it's a good weekend when you wake up on Sunday questioning your sexuality.
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
I woke up in my bed with candy and beer bottles all around me and i dont know where any of it came from. I love valentines day.
Randomize
