This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
You called me twice to tell me that you spit in your own eye, when I was right next to you.
There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
shape ups are the best shoes to wear when youre stoned. its like walking on little trampolines every step.
She came to the party with six kegs and a life sized portrait of Lavar Burton. SHE WILL BE MY WIFE.
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
I don't think I've ever had this many people offer me blow before. 3 o'clock on a Thursday. I keep good company.
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
That portable toilet under the bed? Turns out it was a tuba. Explains alot.
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