I just told this girl who bought a pregnancy test "good luck"
My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
I called the bar to ask if they found my Id and credit card and they remembered me as 'the girl who signed her receipt in blood'
we just got kicked out of the mexican restaurant. i have a full pitcher of margarita's hiding under my coat.
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
Hey is there a picture of me in a trash can on your phone?
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
Randomize
