I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
Promise me that if I become one of those sad people that facebook pesters you to 'reconnect with' you'll tell me so I can delete mine and save myself the humiliation?
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
Drunk texting with my high school teacher. This hurricane is bringing out the best in everyone!
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
The NSA quit spying on phones. I'm sending you SO MANY dick pics.
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
it's not rock bottom until you fall down an escalator on the way home from a hookup and have to have you dad come pick your drunkass up at 3am. Adulthood.
Randomize
