all she had left on were here heels. phone five
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
He pissed on a police station. Then expected to not be arrested. Sounds accurate.
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
I think the Predator is hunting me in my house. If I don't text you later, send Danny Glover. I love you all.
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
Randomize
