she's leaving w me bro, I've been buying her mad shots. She's seen my apt. So locked down.
woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
He just had a handle of vodka with ice in it yelling at people hot august night mother fuckaaaaa and was pouring it on his face
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
in a last ditch attempt to make life awkward after i die today i want to be buried naked and have an open casket funeral.
Just told myself the phrase "You're not THAT single" while dressing myself
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
Randomize
