normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
they were having a wine tasting so i tasted every wine...then knocked over an entire display of gourmet olives and was asked to leave... but they still let me buy my 6 bottles of wine before escorting me out
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
Ordered a large pizza and definitely just paid the cab driver in pizza slices. I'm glad there's someone out there that's just as fat at heart as we are.
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
if jesus wore shoes made out of pure flavor and hurricane kicked u in the face thats how it feels to eat pizza bites right now
She was going down on me before I had a chance to tell her I arrested her brother 3 hours earlier
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
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