Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
Molly wanted me to tell you, "she hasnt shit on the floor in a while" like she thinks its an accomplishment.
i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
What is the protocol for an "i'm sorry I had my ex retrieve me from the bar so I didn't drive drunk" blow job
You bought champagne and told everyone it was because I'd just found out I was pregnant. How exactly is that being a good wingman?
Can I color on your dick again?
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
Welp, just took a tab of acid and cracked one of three bottles of champagne... Mondays ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
So, my eyeglasses somehow ended up in my nightstand drawer and they're covered in lube.
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
Randomize
