She was running around the bar, demanding everyone call her Jesus or else she would attack them like a llama. ack.
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
His drunken night ended with a "car accident" which really meant he was stuck in a toy car and pushed down the steps.
I sat down with you and helped you write your will last night. I was THAT convinced that you weren't waking up.
I saw a girl walking around campus with bandages on both her knees. I need to get her number.
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
Things you do not want to hear after sex: I almost lost my gum in your pussy. Really dude, don't share that with me!
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
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