dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
Alright this has to stop. Without adderall I don't even have the motivation to get laid. College has ruined me.
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
Just spent the equivalent of my life savings in the liquor store. This is going to be a good weekend
It's a toss up. They'll either laugh and watch you drunkenly fuck on the beach or they'll throw you deep in Mexican jail.
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
You should come over tomorrow. Wine, pizza and my vagina. Those are all great things.
in your professional opinion, what's the most elegant way of saying "sorry I spent all night flirting with you, I thought you were gay" ?
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
Randomize
