i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
After giving the pizza guy directions you told him to look for the big stupid looking kid outside in purple
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
THANKS BE TO BLACK BABY JESUS IN HIS LITTLE GOLDEN DIAPER FOR BLESSING ME WITH NOT PREGNANT
Honestly his girlfriend says she hates me cause she thinks im trying to get him to cheat on her with me...she should hate me cause i already accomplished that.
Randomize
