sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
I shouldn't have to say "get your balls off my counter" on a Wednesday.
I have never smelled more like a drunk mariachi band than I do right now.
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
Watermelon juice. Makes everything better. Gin. Wine. EVERYTHING.
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
This is a crisis. I had a huge crush on him in seventh grade and now his girlfriend is due to have his child on my birthday. HIS CHILD CAN'T BE BORN ON MY BIRTHDAY.
Randomize
