is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
I don't have nearly enough visine for the dryness from sticking my head out the window on the freeway for 20 minutes. Child lock me next time.
We were talking about threesomes when she went to say who she would have as her third. She did not get to finish her sentence because her bf already said my name.My sheer presence destroys relationships.
I just had a dream that I was pulling you around downtown on a sled, from bar to bar. Dear lord if we start that there's no hope for us
my boss just accepted "because it's 4/20" as a legitimate reason to take Friday off
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Justin Timberlake, while dressed as Britney Spears. Fuck Jessica Biel, all my 90's dreams are coming true.
Is there a coat check? I stole 10 vases of flowers along with two bottles of champagne and I'm not sure what to do with them.
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
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