the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
Remember back in the day when getting fingered in the movie theater was the best thing ever?
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
I never want to hear the words unlimited shots for boobs in the same sentence ever again.
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
Holding a cold bottle of mikes hard lemonade against my pulverized taint....this is my Sunday night
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
he threw an umbrella that he ripped out of the table at the fence like he was harpooning a whale while the owner of the bar was outside then tried to blame it on an old man...
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
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