You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
Apparently someone switched my cash for monopoly money after midnight so I couldn't get any more drinks at the bar
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive.
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
Every single person in NY is either baking, drinking, or photographing their cat. Reporting live from Instagram.
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
It's been two dates and she just invited me to her aunts funeral. I can't even. Who the fuck does that? I need to drink I'm coming to get you in 5
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
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