I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
Could you explain why there is an Australian passport in your toilet?
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
Now have a vodka water and get your shit together
Semen is not good for contacts.
I'm gonna take my bong and hot box the pirate ship in the daycare playground.
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
She can't meet us until 830...there's no hope for our sobriety at that hour
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
First you stole a hockey stick out of the nieghbors yard and claimed you were moses leading his children home. Then you led us around the same block twice before I called the cab
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
