I molested 6 butterflies tonight
What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
One of my bosses just told me she's having communication problems because mercury is in retrograde this month. I think she's serious.
Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
I also have to vacuum the broken noodles out of my suitcase...
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
I mean, he's 40, foreign, artsy but with substance abuse problems and estranged children. How is he not my type?
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
Randomize
