dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
Old men and throwing up are my life now.
And then you told your sister how horrible of a friend I was because I couldn't get you cheese fries...
Puked in a cab. Passed out on my floor an my mom put a blanket over me. Home by 1045. I won shitshow trophy last night.
if I end up fighting someone to save $15 on a toaster oven then something went wrong earlier in life
No more Irish car bombs ever.
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
I feel like he knows I had a dream about him eating me out in the janitors closet at the holiday party. He's giving me THAT look.
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
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