More tranny stories later!
Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
Segways are the fanny packs of transportation. Useful in some situations, but you always look like a tool when using one.
I want to have a prehistoric party. By that, I mean I want to dress up as a dinosaur and get drunk. That's all I want in life.
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
What's a nice way of saying "You fell asleep, and I got bored, so I made out with your brother"?
So I craigslisted sugar daddies and I'm pretty sure I found us one if you can pretend to be asian.
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
I miss using glorious as an adjective. I'm gonna start doing that again. And I'm gonna try to get cuntatrosphe in there some more, too.
I just had to explain to a 5 year old why I had fuzzy handcuffs hidden in a macaroni box under my bed.
I'm on my third roll of toilet paper. Today can fuck right off.
The lady at the front desk wished you a happy hangover.
Randomize