how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
and you said cock pushups were impossible
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
I dont have enough money in my bank account to buy a pregnancy test. this wouldnt be the first time ive had to steal one either...
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
Admitting I go to nursing school is my subtle way of saying, yes, I know every muscle in your penis and how to effectively use them.
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
Sudden memory flashback: drunk me outside ripping my tampon out and throwing it into the neighbors yard, silently cheering 'time for sexxxx'. I sense a dangerous pattern emerging
at crossfit today a guy shit his pants while deadlifting 405 lbs. coach made fun of him then congratulated him on his new personal record.
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
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