Had sex with the ex last night. Regretting to begin in 5, 4, 3, 2, 1... WHYYYYYYYYYY!
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
I don't think he's ever woke up with a paraplegic stripper sitting on his face before.
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
all but 2 of were put on probation for disorderly conduct. i know, visiting a hospital when your drunk is really stupid but it seemed like such a good idea at the time
swear to god, "it seemed like a good idea at the time" is gonna be on your epitaph
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
you told the cab driver to stop being such a pussy because he wouldn't let you shotgun a beer in the backseat
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
Ok so last thing I remember was hugging a cop while vomiting
Just accidentally flashed my junk to the lady helping me try on suits, it was cold in there, I don't think she was impressed.
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
Randomize