this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
im gonna call it quits for tonight... I am so drunk I dont even have the motor skills to masturbate
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
We had to coat check the pizza.
Is it wrong in Austin to talk to the homeless while I feed a bird my chips??
I have just disproved the common belief that it is impossible to have mediocre sex in a fire truck.
The fire in my vagina flames on. Fucking terrible firefighter
He was all like, "I think ur the one that got away and I miss you." I replied, "I gave u a hand job once in your hot tub. No need to wax nostalgic about it."
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
he told me he had a dream that he laid his head in my lap and silently gazed up at me. WHY AM I ALWAYS THE DUDE IN RELATIONSHIPS
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
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