I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
Mmmm, vodka for breakfast
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
He doesn't need to speak English. He needs to speak sex.
he made a bald eagle out of coke lines
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
I need to stop getting so excited when a guy unzips his pants and its bigger than my boyfriends. I look like a kid in a candy store.
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
Randomize
