I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
He told me to pick a safe word. I said 'cactus' and he said I wasn't taking this seriously and that I wasn't cut out for s&m.
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
You want to groom your chest hair? You mean with a little baby chest hair brush? Because that sounds adorable.
Sitting in my car feasting on the spoils of Taco Bell as Donna Lewis croons "I love you, always forever." A more perfect moment will never exist.
Dude in the stall next to me shitting and sobbing. Dude another stall over, "Come on bro, you gotta loosen up." This is why I don't shit in public.
I want a musical about memes.
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
We somehow ended up in Oklahoma. Nick's been crapping for two hours and I'm afraid to call a doctor because who the hell knows what sort of stuff goes down in the middle of nowhere. So not a great long weekend really.
Randomize
