i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
Dear yesterdays makeup, Thank you for always being there when I stay up late binge drinking on weeknights and am running late to work Friday morning. You're the best.
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
Woke up in an unfamiliar basement in a sleeping bag with Matt to a police officer shining his flashlight in my eyes and asking me my birth date and social security number. My morning went swimmingly.
he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
She started doing push ups and calling me a pussy. Never set me up with your ROTC friends again.
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
Holy shit dude........stairs
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
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