Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
Pooping in your heated bathroom to the sound of rain and instrumental guitar might be the greatest experience ever.
I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
My dildo fell into the bathtub. It sounded like a chainsaw.
i think I'm just gonna buy a new vibrator, body pillow, some guys cologne to spray on it, a life time supply of wine and weed and be done with all this shit
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
And also the fact that I woke up sandwiched between two gay men is probably fueling my day
walked into my roommates bathroom to her throwing up a quesadilla while singing come on skinny taco
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
Lost my pants last night. Really need to stop taking shots of whiskey like I'm eating skittles.
Randomize
