Having your wife answer your cell was so lame. Maybe we can talk when you get your phone, your facebook account, and your balls back.
the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
Gave a homeless guy 3 bucks earlier. Just saw him at the bar. He bought one beer and left. Happy to see my 3 dollars was well spent
I'm helping my Mormon ex boyfriend from high school embrace his inner cross dresser. This is truly god's work.
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
What are your plans?
Get picked up. Convince you to leave work. Smoke. Drink. Fly helicopters.
Stalker pic that shit
He left, I think he got uncomfortable when I started singing 'oompah oompah doodley do, I have a special riddle for you'
Yeah I ended up covered in the mud by the end, in a lady bug golf cart that was blasting jazz music with a dead phone
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
He must've been a bear in a previous life. My nipple is bleeding. Shit's sensitive.
He said he couldn't fuck me cause I kinda looked like my brother
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
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