We're going on a mission for new porn. And ice cream.
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
duuuude. vodka popsicles DO NOT function.
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
Of two things I'm absolutely sure: 1. I only took 2 hits off that joint and 2. I definitely ran over hedwig on the way home
No, I barely made it home last nite. Kept telling cab driver I live across the street from Susan Sarandon?? Thank god her coop addy is posted online.
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
Got caught up in a real life love triangle. Both guys wanted me. I'm tempted to just run off with the cute girl from McDonalds instead
Please do that
Randomize
