More tranny stories later!
If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
I like how the only thing you spelled correctly is "i'm tequila"
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
My boss followed me on Twitter. Excuse me while I delete 90% of my tweets
I'm going to avoid eye contact because my old high school English teacher is not who I feel like seeing after I just had a dick in my mouth
To me, you're the Patron Saint of good music and handjobs
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
I love standing in line at rite aid for 10 minutes being forced to talk to my ex's mom about life while I'm holding nothing but yeast infection cream
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
its as if im in a choose your own adventure book. except im not the reader and someone else is choosing my fate...one awesome decision at a time.
Randomize
