I wish I could test you the smell I just had to experience. It smelled like this lady was microwaving squirrel rectum.
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
I get a nice feeling when i open my fridge and see it filled with thirty beers and half a leftover jimmy johns pickle.
i remember introducing him to all my posters and making him be extra nice to frank sinatra and bob dylan before he fucked me
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
I tried exercising today. I ended up masturbating to the Wii fit trainer.
I am going to be fat forever.
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
It is a fiery spray of napalm-covered beautiful words that leave a flaming "fuck you" on the ground after I destroy him.
His ex told me that she wanted me to "take care of" him but from the way she said it I couldn't tell if she wants me to look after him or murder him.
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
If I get really high and watch Beauty and The Beast on our Netflx account, will you judge me?
Only if you start before I get home!
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