Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
If she makes a move, pretend to have a seizure.
Today is all about not throwing up, where the fuck are my keys and does anyone know what happened to that guy in the panda suit my roommate had sex with last night.
I was just the victim of a drive by judging in a horse and buggy.
The fuck? Where?
St. Mary's. Amish people. Too high for this.
I manage to fit my wine bottle in my koozie and the rest is history
Randomize
