I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
Amanda Bynes on the cover of maxim is my 8th grade masturbation fantasy come to life
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
Todays life lesson brought to you by last nights half pitchers of cheap sangria: you'll never get the stain or the SMELL of sangria vomit out of your bedroom carpet.
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
Confession: Sometimes I wear my stolen scrubs to the corner store because people will think I'm a doctor and not just a girl too lazy to change out of her pajamas.
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
She tried deep frying a banana by placing one, unpeeled, into a toaster.
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
I was trying to type "I just want you naked" and it put "I just want you baked"
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