no one will drink with you if you continue to listen to beyonce
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
HER PREGGO ASS BROUGHT SPEGHETTI-O'S... IN HER PURSE.
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
I think you begin to realize how unfair life really is when you're high and you discover that the new box of fruit by the foot on your shelf is actually empty
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
Just stopped at a cross walk because the light turned red 3 streets down. I'm way too high.
Randomize
