well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
Actually, you don't want to see me.. reached an all time low drinking kahlua out of the bottle concealed in a macdonalds bag
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
Best line overheard at the bar: "This is the last time I'm shaving my ass for him...I mean we just broke up".
i got woken up by a cockroach crawling onto my hand and now i'm pretty sure i'll never be clean again
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
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