I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
I asked him to make me two boxes of macaroni and cheese. That's like eight servings. How did I think that was an okay amount.
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
I’M PUT OFF FROM FOOD RN BC EARLIER I GOT SOME WATER AND I WAS 4 SIPS IN WHEN I NOticed A FUCKING BURGER KING F R Y IN MY D R I N K
Randomize
