According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
I came home to the cats covered in paint and he was asleep in the tub with a firefighters hat on.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
You told the guy in Wawa you needed his hoagie for "a scavenger hunt" and then called him a "fuckstained Muggle" when he didn't give it to you. You are a delight.
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
It was like Lady and the Tramp, but just tramp and the tramp. And instead of spaghetti and meatballs, we had whiskey and cups
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