Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
i think i have herpe
just one?
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
he said 'i want to be the peanut butter to your jelly, just without the crust' and then tried to take me shirt off
she used her one phone call to ask me about my day
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
remind me not to fuck anymore half bald 20 year olds. because obviously there's attachment issues
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
There's no good way to say, "sorry your son saw me naked on top of your brother"
I spilled a whole plate of queso and salsa on my bed so I'm just eating it off my sheets with chips. How's your night going?
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